Words, Words, Words

I'm not good at a lot of things. Some people can run fast. I can't. Some people can add 2 + 2 and I can't do that without a calculator. But there's ones thing I can do and thats read the heck out of a book.

I've always loved to read. It's easy, as effortless as breathing....without that sounding too cocky. I love delving into a world that I'll never be apart of. I love losing myself in another time, slowly falling in (or out of) love with characters. Gah that sounds cheesy. But guys. Come on. I go to Veritas. I have to love books or face shunning.

Like I said, I've always loved to read. But I always hated when a teacher would ruin a book with "What did the author really mean by this?" or "What is the symbolism of this super minor detail that seems insignificant but really your whole grade depends on it?" HAHA no. I'm about 104% sure that most authors thought it sounded nice when they wrote it. Thats it. The character walking down the stairs does not represent the declining economy. The man sitting on the bench waiting for the bus is not an analogy of America's laziness. Its not that complicated.The guy going down the stairs? He just wants to go to the kitchen. The man waiting for the bus? His car broke down this morning, hence the bus.

But recently, I've fallen in love with books even more. It's not just the story anymore. Its the words. About a year ago I read Atonement by Ian McEwan. I hated it with a burning passion. The story was so stupid. Like really? I hated it. When I finished it, I thought well this going on my shelf for all of eternity where it can be unloved and alone forever so it can feel my hate. But then it started to nag me. I kept thinking of the vocabulary and the seamless weaving of the words. Now, I'm really bad with grammar and all that stuff, so if you see me commit an error of some grammatical type, mea culpa. Anyway, the words in a book can tell a story of their own. That sounds dumb because duh a story is words. “The cost of oblivious daydreaming was always this moment of return, the realignment with what had been before and now seemed a little worse. ”  See? How does that not strike you as beautiful? Yall have a problem. 

Or how about this.

“There did not have to be a moral. She need only show separate minds, as alive as her own, struggling with the idea that other minds were equally alive. It wasn't only wickedness and scheming that made people unhappy, it was confusion and misunderstanding, above all, it was the failure to grasp the simple truth that other people are as real as you. And only in a story could you enter these different minds and show how they had an equal value. That was the only moral a story need have.” 

And this?

“And though you think the world is at your feet, it can rise up and tread on you.”

Ok I'm done. But how can you not love words? They ebb and flow, they howl and whisper, they hate and they love. 

I still hate poetry though. But theres this and its kinda beautiful so theres that.

Wow I literally wrote a novel. Props to you if you made it this far. 

Cancer Sucks

I meant to write this last month but oh well. Better late than never.

Five years ago, I was in 7th grade. I really don't remember much about 7th grade because it was just rough all around. Thank you Jesus that I don't look like I did then. But one thing I do remember is the day when I found out my mom had cancer. I remember my mom and dad sitting in the living room and calling my brothers and me in. That was serious because we never use that room for anything ever. I don't remember what they said because that was a blur. All I knew was my mom had cancer. 

It was weird. I had always thought that when someone got cancer, they would just look different. Like you could see the cancer. But no she was still mom. She never had to do chemo but she did have to do radiation. But that still sucked. She would come home from the treatments and go straight to bed. 

I never heard her complain once. 

And here we are, 5 years later and no cancer. God is good.

My mom is a beautiful woman. And no, I'm not writing this because I'm trying to suck up to her or get her to let me have a later curfew. I'm writing this because she is the best. I don't think you guys understand. I love that she asks me if her outfit matches. I love that we swap shoes. I love that when Free Bird comes on the radio, she turns it up as loud as it'll go. Happy belated birthday mom. I love you.

I Just Want To Go To College

(Ummm I just reread this and its kinda ranty so you should listen to this while you read. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2muto1kBPFg )


So being a senior is pretty great. So far its been the best and worst year of high school. Something great about it is Senioritis. Whats great about Senioritis? You don't do any work. Know what sucks about Senioritis? You don't do the work. So there's that.

For about the past 2 months I've been heading down the college app road. And it sucks. Like it is literally the worst. They keep asking me to give them my grades. Can I just skip that part? Yeah that'd be great. Why can't this be like Legally Blonde where all I have to do is send in a head shot? I'm actually not kidding. And if someone else tells me that really this isn't a big deal, I'm sorry but prepared to be slapped.

And then there's the whole part of dealing with not getting accepted somewhere. How do people deal with that? Since public rejection is not really my favorite thing, I have no idea what to do. So if by the time all the acceptances are rolling around and you don't hear from me, you can safely assume that I'm in a dark corner somewhere sobbing and eating a Chick-fil-A mocha milkshake. Have you guys had that? Stop what you are doing right now and go get one. It's life changing.

If you see me in a t-shirt that has some sort of college thing on it, please don't assume that that is where I'm going. ASK ME. Trust me, I'll talk your ear off about how I have no idea where in the heck I'm going to end up. Mehhh that sounds a tad bit harsh. Deal.

Annnnnnnnd lastly, I'm going to tell you what brought on this tirade.

I was walking out of school today and about to drink some coke zero, when a very nice lady came up to me. See, heres where it gets awkward. I had no idea what her name was. Anyway, we exchanged pleasantries and I was trying to walk away so I could drink my coke in peace, and then she asked the question that I hate to answer because it always ends up with some sort of college question or them telling me to go to the school they went to. "Hows your senior year going?"
Ugh how about no. I told her it was actually great and then I waited for the inevitable pep talk for college. To say that she blindsided me is an understatement. She proceeded to tell me that after your senior year, its all downhill. "Senior years pretty much it. Live it up. But its also the most important year of your life." And then she walked away. Someone should write a book on what not to say to seniors applying to schools, with rule number 1 being DONT SAY WHAT THAT LADY SAID.


I'm just stressed. I love you all. But please. Just get me a milkshake.



I need to put a picture here. I did Lizzie Trumbo's seior pics and I really hope they turned out ok.

Keep Smiling!

-Maddie 

Crocs and Wrecking Balls

So I got a computer last year, and almost from day one its been a little difficult. And by that, I mean it hates me. Essentially every piece of technology I touch turns to dust. I've gone through 2 phones, 6 iPods, 2 cameras and 3 computers in 5 years. I also destroyed the screen on my dads phone by dropping a bottle of ground cinnamon on it. Its one of my many talents. E pluribus unum, people.

So today I went to Best Buy to have a chat with the Geek Squad guys about my dead computer. They really are lovely people.  They deserve a medal. And a bottle of Head & Shoulders because they all had wicked dandruff. Anyway, so while I was waiting in line, this guy got in line behind me. His phone rang (the ringtone was My Humps, so that was strike one) and he picked up. I started listening to the convo because duh what else am I supposed to do in Best Buy? Pretty much the best decision I've made possibly ever. I assumed he was talking to his girlfriend because he called her baby. Anyway, as I was hardcore creeping on the guy, he just starts talking really fast and soon I was under the impression that hes breaking up with his girlfriend. On the phone. In Best Buy. Who does that?

I was dying to know what this guys problem was, then he said it. The most cliche phrase on this planet.

"Its not you. Its me."

He said it. I thought people only did that in really bad sitcoms. So then I had to see who this guy was. I turned my head in the super stealthy, I'm-people-watching-please-don't-notice way and was visually assaulted. He was wearing yellow crocs. YELLOW CROCS. And cargo shorts. I was feeling bad for the girl getting dumped, but not so much anymore. She's probably relieved that she doesn't have to deal with this guys holey footwear anymore.

By this time, pretty much everybody in line and behind the counter knew what was going on. I walked up to beg for some help with my computer and while the girl was looking over it, she started to make small talk about Crocs and Cargo Shorts behind me. We bonded over our mutual hate for him. It was great.


And that was it.


Completely unrelated, has anybody seen Wrecking Ball by Miley Cyrus? If not, I'd say don't because thats not where sledge hammers were ever meant to be. But just a random thought. Ok so isn't filming a video like that awk? I mean when shes swinging on that wrecking ball, didn't everyone on set cringe? I'd just be all uhh I don't know how to respond to this situation. I think she has a great voice in the song, but swinging half-clad on construction equipment is kinda where I draw the line.

Lastly, from now on I'm going to have to post a picture in every post because if I don't then when I link it to Facebook, a picture from a previous post will be the picture for the link. The pics will most likely have nothing to do with the post. I'm just going to post them. If anybody knows how to fix this, let me know because clearly I have no idea what I'm doing with computers.

Keep Smiling!
-Maddie

Too Much For Words, Part 3

Ok so while you're reading this you should listen to this song. It makes me happy.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=btcGAAahSTs

Anyway, this is part 3. So I've talked about the people and the things that I saw, but I haven't said what I felt. I feel like I'm about to spill my guts. Like this is about to get super personal really fast.

I know I just posted this verse on Facebook, but I'm going to post it here because it about sums up whats going on in my mind.

"Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy" 
-1 Peter 1:8

I've got this feeling like I'm going to burst with happiness, love, joy, and excitement. I know when I went on my last trip, I was all ready to move there, learn the language and be a part of that community after I had left, but this is different. I feel it this time. Wow that sounds cheesy but it's how I feel. Last time, that feeling went away when the plane touched down in Richmond and I saw my family waiting there for me to pick me up. To me, it wasn't so much a trip for serving others but was a trip for myself just to say that I had been to a different country. So since that was the only time I went out of the country, I had the same expectations coming into this one, except that this was London and that was a third world country.

When we got on the streets walking around, I was disappointed. No more than that. I was angry. Don't ask me what I was angry at because I don't know myself. As we were walking, I kept thinking "No, this is not what this is supposed to look like. This is not what Masterpiece Theater told me it would be like. I do not like this." I just kept thinking great what have I gotten myself into? I'm going to spend my time here? In this place? When am I going to see Big Ben?

It took me a little time to simmer down with all the pissy thoughts running through my mind, but by that time we had walked to church, which I was only half aware of because I was weaving in and out of a jet lagged haze and I was just thoroughly ticked off. Then people started singing in not English and that was pretty much the last straw for me. Like, do you know how inconsiderate it is of you to sing something that isn't a hymn? Where's Amazing Grace or Rock of Ages?

Then something happened. Wow doesn't that sound dramatic? It might as well have been a bomb going off next to me because I would have payed just as much attention. Want to know what it was? It was this little old lady walking up to the mic to talk. I'm not going to lie, I had no idea what she was doing up there because I was paying zero attention to the guy talking. Didn't they know I was tired?

Then she started talking. And talking. And talking. But with every word she painted a picture of love. A love for God and for others. A love for those that despise her and those that are lost. I wish I could have brought her home so I could show her to every single person I meet because I want them to be be moved by the most godly woman I have ever met in my life. Every word held me captive and I wanted her to keep talking but I also wanted her to stop because it felt like she was talking to me in my selfishness and essentially reprimanding me for my attitude and all the thoughts I'd been having towards this trip. She helped me realize that I was there not for me, but to serve others.

I'd like to say from that point on, I had no negative thoughts towards anything on that trip. Heck. No. But my heart changed.

So that's the end of my blog updating for London. I really could go on for the next 4 hours just talking but I'm not going to do that. If you want to know more, talk to me.

Keep Smiling,
-Maddie

Too Much For Words, Part 2

I know I said I was going to do another post to London, but really I could go on for ages.

So this post is for specific little stories that happened. I really hope I can remember them. We were supposed to have a team blog and I was supposed to help update it when we (finally) got to London. Well when we got there, a leader told us that I couldn't update it now but tomorrow would be fine. Then the next day, the same answer was issued. Then the next day. And the next. And thus the blog fell apart. While I was supposed to update the team blog, I was going to write on this one as well so that didn't work either. So now I'm going to try my best to remember the things I saw. These stories are going to be pretty random and might not make a lot of sense but bear with me.

Public Transportation

Ok so we had just got on the tube with our luggage and we got our first taste of where we were going to be spending the next week. Also, we were so loud. Like people moved to another place to sit we were so loud. But one guy didn't move. He was this little Asian man sitting right across from me and Emma. We didn't think much of it because there really were no more seats left to avoid the loud Americans. So there we were, playing card games, laughing and trying to stave off the suckfest that is jet lag. While we were in the middle of a game of go fish, the Asian guy took a camera out of his man purse and started taking pictures of me and Emma. I didn't think much of it at first but then he just kept on with the pictures. Finally I just looked at him until he stopped. He then took out this little notebook and started writing. He did that for about 20 minutes. And thats the end of my story of the first 30 minutes in London. 

Day 1

This is pretty much how the first day went. Every time we went on a bus or sat down or stopped moving, someone was asleep. It felt like a joke when someone would tell me it was actually 1 p.m.. They had to be lying because it felt like midnight, but really I didn't care because I was in London and I was pumped. I have never been so simultaneously exhausted and excited in my life. 

We walked.

And we walked. 

And we walked. 

But it was great.

Westminster Abbey

So we had just come from Buckingham Palace, which was beautiful and like walking into a movie, and turned a corner and there it was.

Not super sure whats going on here. Guess I'm just real excited to go to church. 

So this last picture? I was going to delete it but there's a story. We were waiting in line to go to the service and once again, we were being the loud and proud Americans that we are. As I was taking this picture, a man bumped into me. And this is the conversation that ensued.

Man: "Oh sorry love I didn't mean to. I hope I didn't ruin the picture."

Me: "It's ok, I got it."

Man: "Oh you're American?"

Me: "Yep." (totally expected him to hate on us..)

Man: "Brilliant! Well keep smiling!" 

It took me 3 seconds to realize what he had just said as he was walking away. So I just yelled back "AH THATS THE NAME OF MY BLOG." He turned around and waved and had the biggest smile on his face and walked away. It made my life.

Keep Smiling,

-Maddie

Too Much For Words

London.

It was beyond amazing. I don't think I was prepared for what was going to happen. No. I know I wasn't prepared for what happened. It's not like there was this big, huge thing that happened where I had a life changing moment. It was more like a gradual falling in love where it all just comes at you even when you're not paying attention and when you least expect it and then suddenly everything's different.

I hope that makes sense because that's the best way I can form it into words.

Anyway, it was beautiful.

And the people were lovely. 

Did I mention that the people were lovely? Because they were.

For this trip I was the unofficial photog, but I can't post about 1,100 pictures that I took due to different reasons but I hope you love them even if they're random and odd. But to everyone else who took pictures, will you please post them? Thanks bunches.

I can't tell if I want to make this post a billion years long or split into different installments.  

Guess I'll keep going.

So we drank a lot of tea.

But I'm not going to lie, this was one of  the best parts of the day off.

Also on the day off we bought lunch then I had to wait outside while everyone was in the bathroom. So I was waiting outside and all these itty bitty European people were staring at me while I held a ginormous bag of food.  #America 

Meh ok I've decided there's going to be a part 2 and 3 because I'm too lazy to continue. And also there's no more space to post pictures..woops. 

But one last thing. I loved everything about this trip except one thing.

This.

Keep Smiling,

-Maddie  

My Childhood

I thought I should spend some time fondly reminiscing about my childhood. But actually it's because once again, I can't sleep. Thank you summer insomnia.

I was a really mean kid. Like not the punch you in the face bully kind of kid, but the hey I'm going to verbally abuse you like no other 7 year old you know kind of kid. I was like godzilla smashing into buildings, crushing the unsuspecting townsfolk with my sarcasm and way too cynical mind. They didn't stand a chance. I really don't know how I made it out alive. But I'd like to give a big shout out to everybody who survived the horrible rampaging and devastation I left in my wake and still tried to be friends with the horrible monster.  Thanks. I guess this is how King Kong felt when people tried to be his friends but minus the whole death thing where he died because they killed him.

Still can't sleep. This sucks.

Alright I'm done with the whole kid thing. But I cant stop writing so......onward.

If anybody's actually reading this, I'm pretty impressed. Go you for finding this link on Facebook. I like that nobody reads this. That means I don't have to worry about getting stage fright.....stage fright writing? Is that a thing? One time I got 800 page views in a day, but I think it was the google team checking up on me because when I posted this I accidentally tagged something weird. Like really weird. But I never bothered to untag it because I'm just that lazy. Love me.

I want to put something relevant and profound in this post. Like you know how when you're falling asleep and you have all those ideas? Like ideas that seem like they could change the world they're so good?  But then you wake up and that brilliant thought was a horse hovercraft or a soup tureen made solely out of asparagus. Those are 100% creations from my mind. Laugh all you want, but you know you've thought that stuff too. But really I have two thoughts that are semi similar

1. To all those people who get on a treadmill and just start running, what are you doing. How the heck do you not walk or at least jog a little bit before hand.

2. To all those people who fall asleep right away. That freaks me out. Don't you have thoughts? It does not seem humanly possible.

And that's about it. Lastly, I would just like to announce the serious struggle I've had while orchestrating this post. Every time I try to type in a contraction like can't or don't my lovely computer changes all of those words into the same word. That word would be downstream. I don't even know.

Keep Smiling
-Maddie

So I'm a Nanny?

I'm blessed to have a really good summer job. Like really blessed. I'm something like a nanny? At first, the mom said it was something like a full time babysitter but that just sounds stupid. So I'm a nanny.

I just finished (well almost finished) my first week with the two kids and if this week is how the summer is going to be then I cant wait. I know we're going to fight, pick at each other, and generally annoy the living crap out of each other. 

I spent all week dropping the kids at a golf camp, watching movies, playing board games, listening to country music, and avoiding their three cats. They have three. Three. 

The boy (going into 6th grade) loves board games and I'm fairly sure that if he could, he'd play Monopoly for the rest of his life. That's pretty much what we did all week. He's very quiet and thoughtful and a freaking genius. When it comes to playing a game, I usually go ahead and apologize ahead of time because by the time the game is over, I've offended you with my over competitiveness. So when he bought Park Place and I already had Boardwalk, all I could think was ok kid, do you want to burn this relationship? Things were going so well. But then one of the three cats jumped on the board and decided that the game was over. Why do cats think they own everything? I am not a cat person at all and these people are. Like "they-put-their-face-near-its-jaws-of-death-and-coo-at-it" kind of cat people. No.

Also on the first day, two eventful things happened. 

Event #1: I was dropping the boy off for his first day of golf and the instructor came up to me asking me if I was going to sign my self up today. Uh? the camp is for kids in 2nd grade to 7th grade. And really, does it look like I'd wear golf clothes? Pastels are not my thing. But that's not the eventful thing. While he played golf, I sat in a really old leather chair in a building off the golf course. You know, leather chairs are really great and all but when its hot, leather does this funny thing where when you move, it makes a semi fart noise. Well, right as these two elderly women were walking by, two things happened simultaneously. I dropped my summer reading book (Dracula, thanks a bunch Mrs. Gross) and moved to pick it up. And right as the two women were passing me, the chair decided to unleash an unholy shriek/fart noise. Both women looked at me like I had just yelled an obscene word at the top of my lungs. They hurried past and as they were walking away one of them said, "Oh bless her heart what did she eat?" Had the two been two very attractive guys, I'm sure I would have thrown my self out the window and curl up to wait for death. But they weren't. So I just laughed, causing the chair to emit more shrieks of flatulence. 

Event #2: The kids made me watch Les Miserables. I feel like they were trying to haze me. You'd think that knowing whats going to come would stop me from a full on emotional break down. I mean everybody dies, why is this still an issue. I lose some self respect every time I do that now. 

Anyway, that's pretty much it. 

Keep Smiling,

Maddie

Blogging to Blog

This post really doesn't have a purpose. I just need to do something because I can't sleep. I spent a good 2 hours flipping my pillow over, thinking over alllll the mistakes I made today, and calculating how much sleep I would get if I fell asleep right now.

I'm pretty sure I suffer from Summer Insomnia. I made that up then Googled it. I got at least one result so it has to be legit. I don't know why my body does it. I sleep fine during school but then once summer comes, my body's all "Who needs sleep? Sleep is stupid. You want to sleep, don't you? I bet thats frustrating."

So I decided to blog.

But I have no idea what to say. So I'll make a list because all my other posts have them, so why shouldn't this one? You'd think that having a lot of lists would mean I'm a neat person, right? It would make sense, but I'm the opposite of neat. You should see my room. It looks like Goodwill threw up then a tornado tore through it then got bored halfway through so it decided to take all the books of my shelf and read them all. At the same time.

So heres my list:
1. Morning people shouldn't be a thing.
2. Sunburns suck. But whats the worst part: being a walking inferno of pain or peeling?
3. Don't ever assume that someones not in the bathroom if the doors still open.
4. Is it possible to finish a whole thing of chapstick?
5. Why are there toilet paper commercials? Who is not buying that.
6. I just want to sleep.
7. I took my One Direction poster down. It felt like we were breaking up.
8. All cargo shorts should be burned.
9. Some billionaire should donate money to Pandora so those stupid ads go away.
10. You know the horror movie Mama? Yeah that takes place in Virginia.

You're welcome.


Keep Smiling,
Maddie

Also, listen to this song.
I just want to sleep.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d17XBtNjfzA

Welcome to May: If I survive this, I deserve a medal

Um so I'm about to complain. A lot.

There should be a warning label on junior year, saying something to the effect of "you might die." I don't know, I just feel like it would've helped some. Maybe not. Everybody says junior year is hell, so naturally I was like pft dude watch me own this.

HOLY CRAP NO.

The only way to describe this year:

Suffering because you're literally drowning in work and every time you feel like you're coming up for air you get slammed in the face with a tsunami of textbooks and papers. And you'll be happy about it because all of this work means you'll get into college. Hopefully. Oh sweet baby Jesus asleep in the manger I just want to go to college.

So far this month, I've taken the SAT, given a speech, taken a physics test that took at least a year off my life, and dealt with people. Wait. Nope. Those all happened within 5 days of each other. While yes, I realize that when I go to college it's going to be like this alll the time, I believe that it is 104% ok to rant about it. And now that I look at what I just typed it doesn't seem that big. asdfghjkl.

1. Social Life
2. School
3. Sleep
Pick two.
Someone said this to me this week and all I could think about was if I could just sleep for eternity or have a continual supply of caffeine shots (I don't think that's an actual thing, but whatever), then problem solved. I would willingly spend exorbitant amounts of money to have a Starbucks built in the middle of our one hallway at school. Once again, problem solved.

ANNNNND last but not least, exam week is coming up. So. Fun.

Exam week is like running down a trail and you see a massive brick wall coming up ahead. You begin to think of ways to avoid it.
1. Run around it but then realize this thing is like the freaking Great Wall of China and it goes on forever.
2. Hope it moves. Nope.
3. Run right into it because its not going anywhere. You slowly bludgeon your head against it, and when you think you're about to lose consciousnesses the wall just disappears and you fall on your face and sleep because its all over.

Thats about it.

Keep smiling,
-Maddie

P.S. I quoted Steinbeck, you uncultured swines. I'm smart. Find it.
Also, I love Toy Story.

Spring Fever

Oh hey. It’s been 3 months since I did this last.

Oops.

Well now it’s April. Spring right? NO. I love living in Richmond and really have nothing to compare it to, but come on get your act together RVA. What is this? Winter sucks. Let’s get some heat up in here.

Anyway, when it does feel like spring outside, it’s wonderful. The sun warming (and burning) my albino whiteness, the wind whipping through my hair making it look like a swallows nest, and the POLLEN. Nothing like seeing a nice layer of yellow on everything to cheer you up. Yum.

Despite those lovely aspects of my favorite season, I have yet to mention my most favorite part.

Caterpillars.

There’s nothing like walking under a tree and getting assaulted in the face by those little, squishy things. You walk under the tree, not suspecting the impending attack and then BAM they fling their squirming bodies at you. It’s like they enjoy it.

There aren’t a whole bunch of things that bother me, but these little vermin take the cake. I was babysitting earlier this week and the weather was nice enough to take the kids out. We went out in the yard where the kids played soccer and I sat on the sidelines, every now and then telling the kids that there was no head locking the other goalie in soccer. During a popsicle break, I was picking up the trash from the kids when one of those little green bugs decided to land on me. I flipped. I didn't want that thing on me. After I got it off, the kids were looking at me like I'd grown a 3rd arm. Then they all just grinned. They then proceeded to pick up the nearest caterpillar and chase me with it.

It wasn’t real big on dignity.  Then I remembered I was the adult. I’m a great babysitter.

But actually, I love spring and everything that it brings. Just not caterpillars.

 

Keep Smiling

-Maddie

Stress Happens to Suck. A lot.

"There's nothing like the stress of exam week," said one of my teachers.

THAT IS THE BIGGEST LIE EVER.

What they really should've said was there's nothing like the stress of the week after exams.

After you finish that last exam, you turn it in with either a smug, little smile on your face knowing that you owned it or it owned you. Either way, you feel pretty confident overall. Maybe. You then spend the next weekend reveling in the blissful freedom of no work, no deadlines, and the rediscovered ability to sleep. It's pretty much the best.

You walk into school knowing that you get your grades back today. There's a slight nagging feeling that you should've studied a little more for that one exam, but then you banish the thought with a quick burst of semi-misplaced self-confidence. You got this.

Then the “Steps of How Your Life Gets Slowly Ruined” begins.

Step 1. You are waiting for the exam back, thinking about how it went. Mehh I think I did ok on this? Come on, it can't be that bad.

Step 2.  Get the exam back.

Step 3. Realize that you’ve done horrible and you’re going to die. But knowing the full extent of your exam’s merciless harassment, it won’t let you have a quick and painless death.

Step 3.5. Since your mind is blowing circuits, it decides to think “you know what you haven’t thought about in a while? Everything else you suck at. Have a nice day!”  Wonderful.

Step 4. Your mind begins the spiral of the illogical end that you will face. Because of the exam, you will be laughed out of school. You will never get into college because you’ve been put on a “most wanted” poster. And not in a good way. Then somehow you will become homeless.  

Step 5. You die, thus meeting your demise all because your 1^st semester physics exam sucked.

After recovering from the shock, you think, “alright how can I make this all better? Oh I know, I’ll just work and the grade will be better!” Yes. Perfect. Then you realize that there is no work to do because the semester is over so you really can’t do anything.

You die.

The End.

Keep Smiling!

-Maddie